


An End of an Era

by volvi



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Awkward Flirting, Blow Jobs, Bottom Sherlock Holmes, First Dates, First Time, Fluff, M/M, Top John Watson, Virgin Sherlock
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-26
Updated: 2014-09-16
Packaged: 2018-02-14 21:04:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2203071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/volvi/pseuds/volvi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John and Sherlock have finally decided to go out on a date. First romance on Sherlock's part, other firsts on John's.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The First Step

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter is work safe, but I can assure you that sexy times will occur later on. ;) They just have to sort themselves out first, in order to get the relationship going.

Shower? Check. Hair? Check. Perfume and after shave? Check. Outfit? Check. He was ready.

* * *

It was just as that time when he’d asked Sherlock to be his best man at his and Mary’s wedding. This was just as obvious a question really. Of course he and Sherlock should go on a date. They had been living together for months now and during all that time they had tried to find any possible excuse to be as close to each other as a close friendship could possibly allow. Therefore it hadn’t been all that hard to one day at breakfast just ask him if he was interested in dating after all.

“Sherlock, how would you feel about going on a date?”

“Well John, that depends.” He didn’t so much as looked up from his microscope. “Why would I do it in the first place? Was it for a case? If more than an eight I would perhaps give it a thought.”

“No, no, not for a case. Just, you know, because you like the person that asks you out and because maybe you would like to see where it would take you. You know, you and that person…”

“John, why are you talking using present?”

“Well, what if I was to ask you out?” It all went quiet. John waited for what seemed like years before he continued speaking. “What would your answer be? We can just pretend this never happened if you like. You could just go on and delete it…” John wasn’t able to look at Sherlock. How he ever could’ve thought this was a good idea he couldn’t for his life fathom. “Sherlock, please, just forget what I said.” He was starting to get up and leave for the bathroom, just to get away, when he dared to sneak a peek at the man opposite him. “Sherlock?” He was staring into nothingness, just like all these months ago before the wedding. Although this time there was a difference. If John didn’t knew better he would almost think that the detective was on his verge of tears. John sat down once again, waiting for an answer of some kind. It took some seconds before Sherlock got himself to it. His voice seemed different from his usual, it was in some way smaller and lacked the usual sting. He seemed insecure, like he was being made fun of.

“John, if this is your idea of a joke or…”

“No! No, no, no, no! Absolutely not! I am asking you out, honestly, I just want to go out for a dinner and see where it takes us. Why would I be joking?”

“Well, you have made your mind quite clear during all these years that you are not in any way interested in men, so forgive me for not taking you seriously.” Once again his voice had gotten back its ordinary sarcastic tone (maybe a bit more than ordinary), but he still didn’t want to meet John’s eyes.

“I’m still not gay, just consider me… curios.”

“I do not wish to be your experiment.”

“And that’s coming from you.” Sherlock didn’t seemed to get the pun. “Consider me Sherlock-sexual then.”

“Sherlock-sexual? So this has to do with sex? Are you feeling lonely after Mary? Because if so, you could just start seeing women again. That would be way easier and not as disappointing.”

“Disappointing?” John decided to ignore that first part.

“Obviously.”

“Not to me.” Now Sherlock met his eyes.

“Why would you want to go on a date with someone you cannot seem to go a day without feeling the urge to strangle? I always upset you and you accuse me of being rude at least twice a week.” John had to admit he had a point, but this had really nothing to do with it.

“Because I like you, you git.” Once again everything went quiet. “Come on Sherlock, when will you start believing me that I am not in it just for the adrenalin? I like you and I would enjoy taking you out and see if there’s anything more to it, so what do you say?” Gosh, keep it cool Watson! Don’t get ahead of yourself, what if he says no! Talk about embarrassing, you better start packing your things if you continue in this way.

“Yes.”

“Yes?”

“Yes, p-please. Yes please, let’s go out.” John looked up and he could see the detective blushing. “Just don’t get too disappointed if I do not live up to your… expectations.”

“Oh please, you already are.” John got up and couldn’t help but to smile widely. This was perfect, no this was more than that! He felt like being on pink, fluffy clouds. Gosh, he felt like he’d done when he was on his way to prom with that girl Amelia back when he was fourteen. Like when they’d snogged for thirty minutes in the back of her brother’s car and he had finally… No, keep it cool Watson! Sherlock looked like he had just seen a ghost, which in his case was far worse than for any other, being a man of logic and reason above else. John almost felt sorry for him, but didn’t know what to do to make the mood lighter. Of course a part of him would just have wished to lean forward and kiss that shocked face right off him, but it didn’t seem like something they would do. Especially not when for the first time after five years of knowing each other they finally got to talk about their feelings. (Or at least admit that they had some.) He went with laying a hand on the detective’s shoulder and giving it a short squeeze before leaving.

* * *

While putting on his shoes John tried to not think about how awkward things had been between them these last two days. They had barely talked, apart from the usual questions and answers. (“Do you want tea?” “Yes.” “Are there anything poisonous in the fridge for the moment?” “No.”) Maybe this had been a really stupid idea after all. Maybe he should’ve just let things be. It wasn’t like what they already had wasn’t enough. Suddenly it felt very important to make sure that Sherlock knew that. What if he had said yes just to please him? What if Sherlock thought that John would leave him if they didn’t do this? John had to tell him that wasn’t the case. He would never be able to do that, not now, not when they had left each other too many times as it already was. All he ever wanted was to stay at 221B, solving crimes and smashing in heads on criminals every once and awhile. Sherlock had to know this, preferably before they were to be at the restaurant. John glanced at his wristwatch, he had thirty minutes before they were to meet up so Sherlock must still be at Bart’s. That gave him just about time to go there and cancel the whole thing before things went downhill for real.

* * *

_“Meet you at Bart’s, if you’re still there.”_ Why? Why had John suddenly texted him saying that he wanted to meet him here? Was he going to call it off? Maybe it had all been a joke after all. Maybe Mycroft really was right about sentiment being a disadvantage. The thought of it made Sherlock nauseous. He tried to comfort himself with the knowledge of that it was never going to work anyway. Even if they would’ve gotten as far as a second date or even if they would’ve actually gotten together, John would’ve come to reason and break up with him. He had known since childhood that he was to be alone, there was no way that someone could ever want him as more than a colleague. Although, when thinking about it, hadn’t he been wrong about that? Hadn’t John said that he was his best friend? Maybe, just maybe, this was real after all… The door to the laboratory opened.

“John.”

“Sorry, I just wanted to talk to you about something before we were supposed to meet up…” He looked to be in distress. So this was it then, he had come to take it back and he didn’t know how to do it. Sherlock would spare him the humiliation.

“Don’t worry John, consider it forgotten. I’m doing a research on the dexterity of body hair so I might as well stay and finish it. Don’t stay up.” Sherlock felt like he was going to be sick.

“What?” Even though John had went to the hospital in order to call it off this was not what he had in mind. It almost seemed like Sherlock thought this was for his sake, when it was supposed to have been the exact opposite. What if he’d been wrong about Sherlock not wanting to? They had finally gotten this far, he couldn’t give up now! “No, I… I just wanted to come here to take you to the restaurant myself. You know, we haven’t talked much the past few days so I thought that maybe it would be nice to… go there together.” That sounded lame, but it was the best he could come up with at the moment.

“Oh…” So it was really going to happen after all! Suddenly the nausea was all gone, although the nervousness that Sherlock had been feeling the last few days hadn’t went with it. “Okay then, I will just get my coat.”

“Yeah, great!” They both smiled, genuinely. Perhaps this would turn out rather splendid after all. All they had to do was to behave like they always did. It wasn’t like they didn’t knew each other. Heck, they were going on their sixth year as friends. John felt considerably more relaxed when reminding himself of this. What Sherlock felt though, well, let’s just say he was starting to wonder whether it wouldn’t have been easier to not fake his suicide all that time ago, just in order to avoid that fluttering feeling in his stomach.

_To be continued~_


	2. The First Date

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John and Sherlock are on their first date and things get a bit awkward, as always with those two.

On the way to the restaurant things had actually been a little less awkward than John had been fearing. They had talked about Sherlock’s experiment and John had told him a bit about his day at work. It had in fact been a comfort to John to see that Sherlock’s lack of interest in anything that had to do with him – directly or subconsciously – hadn’t been altered just because they were now dating. (Dating Sherlock Holmes! Good job doctor Watson!)

“You are smirking. Why are you smirking?” Sherlock looked at John while he held the door so that the doctor could step inside.

“Well I was just thinking about this. How nice this is.” John’s smile could now only be described as sincere, something that made Sherlock blush. (Luckily enough his collar was turned up and therefore able to hide this inconvenience.)

* * *

 

The dinner was lovely. They had decided to try out a new Italian place just some blocks away from their flat. It felt better to be at someplace neutral, this being the first date and all. John was half way through his pasta when he suddenly felt something against his foot. Was Sherlock toe flirting with him underneath the table? Maybe he just felt the need to stretch his legs, they were quite long and the table not that high. But then again, they had been in more narrow places and this was something totally new. John decided to go for it.

“J-John!” Sherlock immediately pulled back his feet. Just a stretch then. Damn.

“Sorry, won’t happen again.”

“No, I…” John looked up expectantly. “Never mind.” It seemed like John had to get something stronger than a glass of red wine in order to get Sherlock out of his shell tonight.

They continued to eat in silence. When John had put down his fork their waiter came up to ask if they would like some dessert. He was just about to ask for the check (it seemed like the right thing to do since stuff was probably just going to get more awkward anyway) when Sherlock ordered a vanilla and caramel pannacotta.

“Just one?” John asked when the waiter had left with their plates.

“I thought we could share, since I don’t eat that much anyway.” Sherlock stared at a spot behind John and he seemed to be uncomfortable of his own idea.

“I wouldn’t say that, as soon as it’s something sweet you use to eat quite a lot.” John smiled, but Sherlock was still not able to look at him. The doctor then reached for his hand. It was like a bolt had hit them. Sherlock jerked and finally met John’s eyes. John just continued to smile while consciously refusing to move his hand. After what felt like hours he could finally feel the detective’s palm return the gesture. “See, that wasn’t so bad, was it?” Once again Sherlock blushed, but he kept their eye-contact this time. They sat there, holding hands, for a while. John could feel something hot starting to stir in his stomach when Sherlock’s thumb suddenly caressed his fingers. Both of them got a bit disappointed when the pannacotta arrived, although they did their best not to show it. Who would know what the evening had in store for them?

The rest of the dinner went smooth. Even though things was a lot more quiet today than it had ever been when they had shared a meal before, it felt less awkward now after the hand-holding. Sherlock ate the majority of the dessert, just as John had foretold, but he had pushed all the berries over to John’s side of the plate. He didn’t know if it was because the detective himself didn’t like them (probably) or because he tried to be sweet, but John’s heart melted nevertheless.

He had just eaten the last raspberry when things once again turned a bit awkward. He looked up and was met by Sherlock’s (Blue? Grey? Green? No matter the colour it’s impossible not to drown in them.) eyes staring straight at him. _Through_ him, more accurately. He smiled, a little unsure of what to do. John was more than used to Sherlock behaving in this way, but it was usually either because he was doing something in that mind palace of his and didn’t took the effort to lay his eyes elsewhere or he was deducing something about John. This felt different. It was more like two days ago when John had asked him out. He felt really awkward about it.

“Eh…” He had to break the tension and say something. “Would you like a drink or coffee or something before we leave?” Sherlock jerked like there was someone screaming right in his ear.

“Coffee. Coffee would be nice.” He smiled in a way that John thought as to be very insecure. “If that’s what you want.” Now the detective looked away. So that’s what it was all about! Sherlock was unsure of how to act because he had probably never been out like this before. He had no idea what was to be expected, of course that had to be it. Hadn’t he even said this out loud to begin with? Married to his work and all, it had been crystal clear since day one that this was most probably Sherlock’s first date ever. When thinking about it, hadn’t Mycroft initiated that Sherlock was a virgin as well? John had to admit he had thought about that quite a lot before The Fall (don’t think about it John, not now, that part is long gone). After the drama with Irene Adler, John had got a bad habit of getting back to Mycroft’s comments on Sherlock’s lack of sex life whenever he was having a wank.

“If you prefer, we could’ve coffee at home.” He really wanted to show Sherlock that this was not that big of a deal after all, he wanted to make him as comfortable as possible and it felt like that was easier when at home at 221B.

“Yeah, we could do that.” Sherlock smiled, he actually seemed more relaxed already.

* * *

 

“Do you still feel like having coffee or would you fancy a cuppa instead?”

“Whatever you want is fine by me.” John’s heart sank.

“No, please, decide. I am up for both.” John smiled and Sherlock looked at him quizzically.

“Well, tea then, as you would obviously prefer it.” John had to talk to him about this. This wouldn’t work if Sherlock only wanted what he thought John fancied. With two steaming cups of tea (sugar and milk in Sherlock’s, just milk in John’s) he sat down in the sofa, next to the detective. Sherlock took his cup with a smile and nod.

“Ehm, Sherlock…” The detective looked up with a frown. “You know that you don’t have to do any of this if that’s not what you want, right?” The frowned was replaced with a serious, yet a bit worried, expression. “I mean, we could still be just us. Nothing would have to change if you didn’t wish for it.”

“Yes. Yes I know…”

“Good. Because I want you to be honest here. I want to know how you feel about this.” Damn, this was awkward. John forced himself to keep his voice steady and keep looking at the man beside him. “About us. Doing this… This being dating.”

“Obviously.”

“Obviously, yeah.” John chuckled uncomfortable. “So, what do you say? Do you want to try this out or would you rather go back to normal?”

“John…”

“Yes?” There was something on Sherlock’s mind, something he clearly wanted to say, but had no idea how to.

“You know when I said you would find it disappointing.”

“Yeah, something you clearly got all wrong, but please, go on.” John let his hand rest on Sherlock’s knee, to try and give him some kind of reassurance that no matter what he had to say, it was all fine.

“No, you don’t see. I got no experience in this. No one whatsoever. You may never hear me say this again so please take my word for it when I say that I am afraid that my lack of… knowledge on this area could ruin what we have. Therefore, I think it would be better, more fitting, if you sought this elsewhere.”

“Better for you or better for me?”

“Better for us.” John removed his hand. “John, let’s be logical about this.” John would’ve given up then and there if it wasn’t for Sherlock’s expression. He didn’t look confident in what he’d just said at all, he just looked… sad.

“I don’t agree.” Sherlock looked up at him. “As long as you don’t say you don’t want this I think we should just go for it. Since when have you not been all about investigating how far things could go?” John was now getting closer to Sherlock. “You have to admit there is something going on here.” His face was now just a couple of inches from Sherlock’s. “It’s like there has been an on-going foreplay for years between us.” He was murmuring now, acting all on instinct. Christ, he needed this. Sherlock looked terrified. “Just…” Their noses was now touching. “Just let me kiss you.” He could feel his own breath on Sherlock’s lips. The detective seemed to have forgotten to reach for air. He didn’t get an answer, all he got was a small whimpering sound and an almost undetectable nod. “Relax, we’ll take it slow.” John whispered before tilting his head and making a go for it.

_To be continued~_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed! Stay tuned for next Tuesday, that's when all the smut happens. ;)


	3. The First Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things is starting to heat up and although it's still a bit awkward they actually get as far as having sex. John is more than happy to be Sherlock's first.

Their lips met and it felt like being a teenager all over again. That was probably the sweetest way in which he could describe their kiss. Sherlock’s lips was lovely, all pouty and luscious. The detective himself was also very sweet (even if it was a bit worrying that he hadn’t taken a single breath in what seemed like quite a while). Maybe John had overthought this beforehand, for he couldn’t help but not feeling entirely satisfied with it all. It was like there wasn’t any heart in it. He backed off and looked at Sherlock. What he saw made him realise that the case was the exact opposite. Sherlock was blanked eyed and his mouth had fallen open. He looked at John while (finally!) grasping for air. He seemed to be going on an overload of emotions because tears suddenly started to fall from his left eye and he was hyperventilating.

“Hey, Sherlock. Sherlock! Take it easy, breathe.” He squeezed the detective’s shoulders.

“S-sorry.” Sherlock looked away and his breathing returned to normal. “Sorry, I don’t know what happened.” He swallowed thickly, still looking away.

“You don’t have to apologise for anything. Maybe we should take it easy and do something else for a while, yeah? Drink your tea and I’ll put the telly on.”

“No. No, I want to try again.” John put his mug back on the table. “That went awful, I wasn’t prepared, let me try again.”

“You want to redo our first kiss?” John was now smiling.

“Oh John, don’t be stupid, there is nothing special with a first kiss.” Sherlock said, pulling himself together once more. “First, second, hundred-and-eleventh, why would it matter?” Finally he met John’s gaze and returned the smile with what John read as a flirty wink. (Oh god, Sherlock looked beautiful!)

“No, of course it matters.” John leaned forward and rested his forehead on Sherlock’s. “But don’t worry, I was only considering what we just did as a prelude for our first, so we still got time to make some improvements.” John couldn’t help but to chuckle at this, something Sherlock was soon to join. “So, tilt that big head of yours a little bit to the left and then let’s do one that counts.”

John couldn’t find words brilliant enough to describe their first kiss. It simply wouldn’t make it justice, no matter which poem he quoted, for that is exactly how it felt. Sherlock had tilted his head perfectly to match John’s. Their lips had touched, hesitantly and full with anticipation. They had begun carefully, just given each other small pecks without moving their faces even an inch. This they had done over and over again, so that it rather felt like one, proper kiss instead of many little ones. Suddenly the pecking had stopped altogether. John had smiled into Sherlock’s mouth and after that open his eyes. He was met by Sherlock’s icy gaze, their mouths still touching. John had brushed his nose against Sherlock’s, to get him to carry on with the kissing. He had then pressed his mouth more firm against his and at the same time started nibbling on the detective’s lower lip. After three whole minutes John decided to back off. They sat there, staring at each other and just breathing.

“That…” The doctor breathed heavily, “Was fantastic!” Sherlock smiled, it was the sweetest smile John had ever seen on the detective. He looked like a school boy who had just gotten a compliment for some big achievement that nobody thought him capable of doing. Once again the doctor leaned forward. “Let’s try some proper snogging this time, yeah?” Sherlock just nodded eagerly, grabbing John’s collar to pull him closer.

John pushed his tongue inside and pressed it to Sherlock’s teeth until he finally let go and opened up for him. If kissing Sherlock was fantastic, snogging him was even better. It took a while, but at last Sherlock got the hang of it and started to return John’s actions. He let his hands move across his back, Sherlock had yet to let go of his shirt. When their kissing became more heated John pushed Sherlock backwards on the sofa so that he was on top. “Oh god. Jesus, Sherl…” The detective bit his lower lip and let go with a small ‘pop’, a sound that went directly to John’s crotch. He started to push his right leg in between Sherlock’s thighs for better access (closer, closer!) and suddenly the detective froze. John backed off and sat up to give him some space. “What’s the matter?” He was worried that he had went too fast, maybe the detective had gotten second thoughts about this? “Sherlock, speak to me. I have to know what I did wrong. Otherwise I may do it again.” John paused. “If you want to continue, that is…” Sherlock looked like to be in deep agony. John carefully petted his knee and that was when he realised. “Oh…” Sherlock refused to meet his eyes. “You know this is a perfectly normal reaction, I know this, I’m a doctor.”

“I bloody well now you’re a doctor John, you keep reminding me!” Sherlock hissed.

“It’s all fine, you got nothing to be ashamed of.” John took a deep breath, he wouldn’t let Sherlock’s lack of confidence spoil this. “If you want us to stop you just have to say it. If you need a moment or…”

“No! No, I just… I’m not just used to this, not being in control of my body!” Sherlock looked deeply upset by the thought of not being in charge of it all.

“Are you telling me you’ve never…” Maybe it was best to use proper English when Sherlock was like this, he didn’t want to embarrass him further. “Have you never had an erection before?” Sherlock gave him a glare that could only be described as poisonous.

“Of course I have!”

“Then what’s the problem?” He really had to tell him because John couldn’t for his life see it.

“Usually I’m in control, usually I know how to deal with it.”

“How _do_ you deal with it?” John tried his best not to smile.

“I… I guess I masturbate if it’s really disturbing, otherwise I just ignore it until it disappears.” It seemed like they had a lot to work on, if this was going to work.

“Why don’t you let me take care of it?” John had leaned forward and was now murmuring. Sherlock gulped. “Let me take you to the bedroom, let me give you this.” John got even closer and kissed Sherlock’s earlobe. “Let me be your first, Sherlock.” This was even better then what he had imagined it’d be like, all these years ago. (Not even that long, he had actually thought about this even when he had been with Mary sometimes, although it wasn’t until two days ago that he had admitted that to himself.) Sherlock didn’t say yes, he just stared at him with big eyes. John kissed him carefully while cupping his face. “Let me just…” One more kiss. “Let me take you to bed.” And then one more. Sherlock nodded, John got goose bumps. “Yours?” Another one. “Or mine?” One last before backing off.

“Mine.” Sherlock reached in and carefully pecked his jaw. “If that’s okay with you.” John leaned his head backwards to show that this was okay, more than okay. Whatever Sherlock wanted John would give it to him.

After what felt like way too short of a time, John decided they had to stop kissing if they were ever going to reach the bedroom. He stood up and reached for Sherlock’s hand. The detective took it and together they made it past the kitchen. When they stood in front of the bed things once again became a bit awkward. What was they supposed to do? John had never been this hesitant before sex, he usually just pushed his partner down so that she was laying horizontally and then things generally continued on their own accord. This wouldn’t be possible now, not with a six feet tall detective. He peered at the man in question and saw that he too seemed to be oblivious of what to do. Time to take the lead, Watson! How different could it be, really?

He sat down at the bed and Sherlock followed suit. Once again they started kissing and John took his chance to push him down in a laying position. “Is this okay?” He whispered in Sherlock’s ear.

“F-fine.” John smiled, he couldn’t help but to feel a bit pleased over the fact that he was the one who got to see Sherlock in this way. The only one. Ever.

“Tell me if I should stop, if it becomes too much.” He kissed down the detective’s jawline, down his neck. Carefully he started to work on the buttons on his shirt, everyone was followed by a small kiss to the newly exposed skin. When he reached the bellybutton he backed off in order to get rid of some of his own clothing. His jumper and shirt was quickly to be removed, but he felt a bit hesitant over taking off his vest. It wasn’t like he was shy or anything, but usually John had sex in the dark since the scar on his shoulder seemed to be quite a turn off for many of his partners. He should have known better though, Sherlock’s eyes was dilated as soon as the scarred skin was exposed.

“May I?” Sherlock’s fingers reached for his damaged shoulder.

“Of course, you don’t need to ask.” John would never had believed it if you would’ve told him beforehand, but what Sherlock did got him to wonder if he had ever been this turned on. First he had just touched the wounded area, very carefully as if touched by a ghost. Then he had leaned on his other arm, reaching out with his mouth. It wasn’t like he had kissed the scar, no what he did was to start licking on it like he wanted to get to know the skin by taste. The fact that John didn’t come then and there seemed more out of pure luck than his ability to restrain himself. “No one…” It seemed to be his turn to stutter. “No one has ever done that before.” Sherlock didn’t answer him, he just continued to lick. John let him continue until he felt like he was just seconds from finishing then and there before he carefully pushed Sherlock back on the bed. His mouth let go with a smacking sound, which made John biting his lip to keep from moaning.

They continued to snog each other senseless while continuing to undress. John was just about to take off his pants when he saw Sherlock turning his head. “You don’t have to look away, you’ll see me eventually.” John chuckled. Sherlock let his gaze fall on John’s crotch and although feeling a bit uncomfortable the doctor tossed his pants at the pile on the floor. He had just hooked his index finger under the waistline of Sherlock’s Dolce & Gabbana when the detective bent his legs. John raised an eyebrow, but Sherlock just bent them further. “Hey, it takes two to tango.” John smiled while kissing the other man’s collarbone. “I’ve seen you naked lots of times, what makes this any different? If anyone, I should be the shy one.”

“Not like this.”

“What?”

“You haven’t seen me like this before.” Sherlock swallowed. “No one has.”

“I know.” John licked a line down the pectoral muscles. “I won’t judge, you got nothing to worry about.” Sherlock’s legs gave away and John saluted that with giving his left thigh a kiss. “Let me see you.” Once again he hooked his fingers under Sherlock’s pants, but this time he pulled. He couldn’t help but to smile. “You’re beautiful.”

“Shut up.” Sherlock was blushing as the same time as he felt relieved because of the compliment. He had been terrified that John would throw one look at him just to realise that this was all a big mistake, that he liked women after all. Sherlock closed his eyes and took a deep breath. This was really happening! He could feel John’s hands on his hips, now with nothing between them. It wasn’t until he felt John’s breath on his cock that he opened his eyes. He wasn’t prepared for the doctor staring right at him. Smiling. “Why are you always smiling?” Sherlock whispered.

“Because I’m happy. Because you are beautiful and because I’m just about to give you a blow job, which I’m fairly sure will be a new thing for both of us.” John giggled and then took Sherlock’s left hand and squeezed it. “Would you let me do that?” Again with the smiling.

“Yes.” Sherlock let his head fall back against the pillows. “I’m afraid I won’t last that long.” This troubled him greatly, they hadn’t even begun yet and he was already leaking with pre-come.

“You are perfect, my first time was over in seconds. Stop worrying and just enjoy it. Enjoy this, us.” Suddenly he could feel John’s mouth close around him. It felt warm and wet, much better than his own hands. John kept working on him, a little bit at a time. Sherlock wasn’t even aware of all the noise that he made, John had been forced to look up in order to check if there was something wrong. Just as Sherlock had foretold it didn’t take all that long before John could see Sherlock becoming all stiff. His hands were clutching the bed covers so hard that his knuckles was turning white and he had stopped breathing. John removed his mouth and replaced it with his hand. “Let go.” He kissed the detective’s groin and worked his hand in a steady rhythm.

One, two, three, four. “J-John!” Sherlock arched his back and widened his eyes. John kept on moving his hand throughout the orgasm, clutching the detective’s palm with his other one. 

“It’s alright, shhh, I got you.” He leaned down and kissed him. “Breathe, just deep breaths.” Finally he started to exhale. John patted his cheek with the one of his hands that wasn’t all sticky. Sherlock looked at him, still breathing heavily. “I’ll go fetch a towel to clean you up. Just lie here and relax, I’ll be back in a moment.” He leaned down to kiss the other man’s nose before getting up. He could feel Sherlock turn to keep him in eyesight, something that wasn’t entirely comfortable since he wasn’t used to moving around all nude. (He wasn’t nearly as fit as he had been during his army days. Compared to the debauched detective on the bed, John just felt like a pudgy, old man.)

“I’ll just have a bit of a wash-up, I’ll be back in a sec.” John closed the door behind him. He had to do something about his own erection and it didn’t feel fair to lay it on Sherlock, not when this being his first and everything. He still got Sherlock’s spunk on his hand so he used that as lube. “Oh fuck!” He leaned against the door. It didn’t take long before he came. He quickly washed his face with some cold water and then fetched a towel for Sherlock. When he opened the door, however, he was met by the detective, standing right in front of him. “Sherlock. Sorry, I just had to, eh…” He smiled and reached him the towel. “I thought you’d stay in bed.”

“I could have done that.”

“Hm?”

“You should have let me take care of you, after what you did to me. I could have…” Sherlock looked the other way. “Returned the favour.”

“You don’t owe me anything, I didn’t want to push my luck.” John smiled and leaned in to kiss his cheek. “Next time, baby.” ( _Baby_?! Really, John, you better pull yourself together or he will be out before you know it!)

“Will there be a next time?” Sherlock whispered, more to himself than to John.

“Won’t it?”

“I didn’t know you wanted too, I thought you had changed your mind and that was why you didn’t let me touch you.”

“Look at me.” John forced him to meet his gaze. “I want this. I want us as this, as we are now. This was lovely and I have been dreaming about this for longer than I care to admit. I’ll promise I’ll tell you if I change my mind, although I very much doubt I will, so please, just stop worrying.” He kissed him, carefully, sincerely on his lips. Their first time may not have been flawless in the sense of performance, but god knows it had been perfect. He wanted Sherlock to feel this as well, to see that they were made for each other, that this was meant to be. “Do you regret it?”

“John, you are still an idiot.”

“Compared to you, that’s all I’ll ever be.” He smiled and leaned in for another kiss. _Perfect_.

_To be continued~_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was so hard to write, my first sex scene ever. x) I hope you enjoy it just as much as Johnlock did~ ;)


	4. The End of An Era

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sherlock lies awake in bed, thinking about him and John. Things are almost to good to be true and the detective wonders if he can actually trust this happiness to last.

The clock struck half past two in the morning. Sherlock had been lying there on the bed, in John’s arms, for hours now. Not that he had anything against it, but he just couldn’t get himself to relax enough to actually fall asleep. Sherlock rarely slept as it was and when he did it was more often in form of a kip on the sofa than an actual full night’s sleep in a bed. This was something completely new, to lie together with someone. Last time he had company like this had been when he had faked his interest in dating Janine. Or actually they hadn’t gotten as far as the bed-part, to be honest. Sherlock had fled the field as soon as he had understood that she expected more than just kissing (he had fled to a crack-den under the pretext of being on a case, but unfortunately both John and his brother had figured it had little to do with his job in an instant) so John was really his first in every kind of way. When thinking about it, Sherlock was glad that this was the case. It seemed like all his doubt about whether John would want him when he realised exactly how novel this was for him had been nothing more than a waste of energy. Still, things felt quite unbelievable. Sherlock had never imagined that someone would want to live with him, let alone take him to bed. Carefully he turned over to his back to be able to look at John. Even though the doctor was sound asleep he reacted to Sherlock’s movements by hugging him closer. This made the detective smile. He would’ve thought being embraced while lying down would make him feel trapped, but instead he felt safe. Safe in a way he hadn’t done since he was just a little boy and Mycroft had taken care of him while he had gotten that nasty cold which he had been stuck with for weeks. He turned his head and looked at John. His breathing was slow and heavy. Sherlock counted to eleven breaths per minute, just about usual for a man his size and age. Usual and ordinary – two words many seemed to use when describing John. How could people be so stupid? Couldn’t they see that the doctor was everything but? Sherlock hadn’t lied during his best man speech, John really were the bravest and kindest and wisest person he knew. Ever since that night when he had shot the cabbie through the window at St Bart’s Sherlock had been aware of this. This had been the reason of his jump off the roof that day in June, this had also been the reason of his return. It was because of this as well that Sherlock hadn’t gotten in the way of John’s marriage to Mary and then, seven months and seven days later, shot Magnussen. All he ever wanted was for John to be happy and the thought of his happiness being connected to Sherlock’s felt too good to be true, like there had to be a catch somehow.

Sherlock closed his eyes and thought about tonight.

_They had gotten back to bed after their talk outside the bathroom. Sherlock had wanted to touch John, wanted to give him an orgasm just as he had received one only moments before. He had kissed him and reached down between John’s legs, but John had told him to stop._

_“Sorry love, you’ll have to wait at least about twenty, I’m starting to grow old.” He had laughed and turned so that they were lying sidewise, looking at each other._

_“You’re not old, John.”_

_“Older than you.” John had smiled._

_“By a couple of years.” Sherlock didn’t want to think about their age. He wanted them to have an eternity together, like this, just together in a bed. He felt like he’d never want to take on another case if it was possible to just stay here, but he made sure to put that thought aside as well, since it was terrifying that everything that had mattered to him for all of his life seemed to be reprioritised. His thoughts got interrupted of John yawning._

_“Sorry.” That smile again. “It seems like I won’t be able to stay awake after all..” John sat up._

_“Where are you going?” There was a sudden sting in Sherlock’s stomach._

_“To my bed to sleep.” Things got quiet for a short moment. “I didn’t know if you preferred to be alone or if you had a plan of sleeping at all so I thought maybe you wanted me to leave.”_

How came John could be so stupid as the same time as he had the habit of seeing things before Sherlock did more often than he cared to admit? Of course Sherlock had wanted him to stay! He shuffled closer to John, so close that he could smell the lingering scent of sweat after them being together on John’s skin.

_“Stay!” John looked down at Sherlock, but didn’t move back to his side._

_“Are you sure?”_

_“Stay. My bed is perfectly fine to sleep in and I haven’t decided whether to rest or continue on my experiment so you may very well get the bed to yourself anyway.”_

_“That wasn’t what I meant, all I wanted was to give you some space. I’d be more than happy to stay here, you know I would.” John returned to his side and embraced him once again. “You **do** know that by now, right?” Sherlock kissed him instead of answering. “Although, I was honest about the sleeping, Sherlock. I will crash in a moment, so don’t be harsh on me if I stop answering all of a sudden.” Again with the smiling. “As if you ever notice anyway.” John leaned in and rubbed their noses together. (I would notice John, today I would.) “Thanks for today by the way, it was a wonderful first date.” John kissed him. “I feel honoured, thank you for letting me in.” Sherlock didn’t knew if it had been the sleep talking because in a matter of seconds after that John had crashed like a log. Still, the things John had said spread over him like a really soft safety blanket and it made him all warm and fuzzy and… safe._

He shuffled even closer to the man beside him. He turned so that his back was now against the doctor’s chest. He could feel John’s body working in his sleep; his lungs breathing in and out, his arms resting heavy around the detective, his heart beating steadily. Maybe he would dare to close his eyes after all. Maybe this wouldn’t turn out to be just another dream of him and John finally getting together. He thought about the conversation he had had with his brother that awful day on John’s wedding; maybe lying here with him was an end of an era. Or maybe, just maybe, all the days before today had been nothing but a prelude for what was yet to come. Maybe he would actually become happy after all.

Sherlock didn’t know when it happened, but sometime during his thoughts he had felt John’s nose against his neck and just before the detective had fallen asleep he was sure he had heard John whisper “Thank you”.

_Fin~_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and especially thanks to all of you who've left comments and kudos and who subscribed to this fic! It means a lot! <3 I had such a blast writing this, even if things turned out quite different of what I first had in mind. That is the best part when writing; you don't really have a say in what's going to happen, the plot is completely up to Johnlock to decide~ ;)

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, hope you enjoyed. My intention is to update every Tuesday for the next three weeks, so I'll keep you posted. ^^


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